Eighteen Wishes for 2018!

1.     May you party like never before on new year eve and be sober next morning, may you always get complimentary drinks and may you eat pasta/ice cream and still reduce your waistline!

2.     May you click the perfect selfies, may you get hundreds of likes when you post it and may your life be as glorious and happening as on Social media profile.

3.     May your Angel Priya be as beautiful in real life as in profile pic!

4.     May your internet history always remain discreet, may you never find a TRAI blocked website and may you easily download whatever you are seeking!

5.     May IRCTC website never hang when you book rail tickets, may you find cheapest online air fares and may you never have travel/hotel deals popping up days after you have completed the journey.

6.     May your mobile never lose charge/balance whenever you need, may you find 4G internet at all places and may offers of Jio 4G internet be as good as they appear to be!

7.     May you win One Billion Pounds in online lottery, may your long lost relative in Honululu actually bequeaths you ten million dollars and may no one ever question your forwarded WhatsApp hoaxes!

8.     May you find cheap Popcorn/Coffee in cinema halls, may your chips packet have less air and more of chips and may you never repent midway during a movie loss of time and money. May your favourite actress/actor remain single even in 2018!

9.     May you never blink an eyelid when your wife/girlfriend asks if she is looking fat/pretty and may you never mix Yes and No in such scenarios. May you have a peaceful domestic life!

10.  May you be never disturbed when you are doing nothing and ‘doing nothing’ is treated respectfully.

11.  May you find socks matching your trousers and matching tie without even looking for it, may you always find the traffic signal green and may you get thirty minutes more of sleep and still reach office 15 minutes early.

12.  May your snores never be discovered while you attending a lecture, may plagiarism tracker fail to find anything wrong in your reports and may you never be caught plucking your nose during a meeting,

13.  May your weekends be free, may you go for exotic outings and may your vacation pictures be source of your social media friends envy.  May you always find clean public toilets when you are need it!

14.  May you successfully link Aadhar with PAN, Aadhar with Mobile and Aadhar with Bank Account. May you link anything with everything. May you be stupid enough never to feel stupid!

15.  May no items on new year resolution need to be repeated next year and may you not feel guilty after watching same repetitive ‘follow your passion’ movies.

16.  May you win debates on religion and politics and yet not lose any friends while debating. May your memory be good enough to recall anything you want and yet bad to keep your conscience clean.

17.  May the mosquito that bites you not be a carrier of Malaria, Chikangunia or Dengue, may you enjoy smoke if you want but are not forced to smoke smog like Delhiites and may you grow more hair than you lose.

18. May you find readers who appreciate satire and you are not asked to explain it. May in this new year, you have your cake and eat it too. Happy 2018!

@Anurag_Sriv1983