Dear Students II

Chairman Shemford School, Principal, Faculty, Parents and Dear students, a Very Good evening!

I am extremely happy and honored to be present here with you tonight. I am as excited as you all are as I am not just a Chief Guest here but a father whose son performed tonight. I had butterflies in my stomach all the time. I compliment the students for putting up such a great show tonight. I am amazed by the potential that I see in all these kids and I am sure they are going to attain great heights in life.

And now coming back to my formal speech, I have been strictly instructed by my wife not repeat what I have already said so many times. I was also advised that if I want to tell anything to the children, I can tell them a story instead.

So, I will tell you a story about a boy. He was like you all in all respects, minus the special talent that you exhibited tonight. He watched TV cartoons, ate lot of candies and was little rude sometimes. I guess he was also slightly lazier than you all. He had loving parents who told him he should behave well with all and great teachers who told him he should work hard. They sometimes made sense to him and sometimes they did not.

One night when he had just got into his bed, he saw from his window that the weather was pleasant outside. There was cool breeze blowing and someone was humming a song. His eyes grew heavy and just then he saw a boy smiling. The boy said his name was Dream and he was here to be his friend. Dream was with him when he was sleeping but he could also see Dream with open eyes. Dream took him to the world of Cartoons, Chocolates and Cakes. Dream could also summon Super heroes, Monsters and Ghosts sometimes.

As he grew up, Dream told him that he should be successful in life. Dream also told him to learn new things or at least try but the boys was extremely shy. He slowly tried to run away from Dream. One-day Dream asked him to perform in the school play, like you all did just now but he did not like it.

He wanted to avoid dream and kept looking outside the window. It was raining heavily and he saw there was another boy getting wet in the rain outside. Before he could say anything, the boy came and said his name was Fear and he wanted to stay with him for some time. Since he wanted to avoid the Dream this time, he agreed to that.

Whenever Dream told him to do something big and not be shy, Fear said he won’t be able to succeed. Fear also told him that if he failed, others will laugh. Fear said only those who were lucky or extremely talented when they were born could do all that.  Slowly Fear also brought his two friends, Ignorance and Arrogance. Ignorance advised you should never worry about what your Parents or Teachers said and you know everything that is required. Arrogance told him that it was OK to be rude and bad. They whispered in his ears that no one loved him in this life. Slowly he was not a good boy and everyone wondered what had changed in his life.

One day it was a bright sunny day and he was playing outside. He saw Dream was just around and he asked Dream if he could come and sit nearby. He told Dream he wanted to do so many things in this life and if Dream could bring him Aladdin’s lamp through which he can realize all that. He had recently read the story of Aladdin and his magic lamp. Dream said he could invite Aladdin but his lamp was not of much help in real life but he knows someone who can help him achieve whatever he desires.

Dream called Hard work who told him that there was no magic in this world and if he wants to succeed in life, he has to believe in what his teachers, parents and his good old school text books said. Now whenever he felt shy or was not sure in life, he called hard work and took its advice. So, before his class tests he practiced many times. During play, he rehearsed his lines many times. Now Fear did not come nearby. 

Slowly being with Hard work, he realized that one needs to work upon how you are. You need to improve upon your weaknesses and play upon your strengths. You can do that if you try to understand yourself. He did not get all the answers but realized that asking questions was what mattered in life. He also learnt that if you know then you cannot and if you do not, then you keep knowing on and on. He decided to retain the twinkle in his eyes for new things of life.

If I think about it now, this boy did what he did because he worked hard, played on his strengths and believed in what dreams told him in his life. Friends I was that boy and I am so happy to share this tonight.

All these children performed so well tonight that I am humbled. Being here with such talented kids, I am reminded of the song by Louis Armstrong:

I hear babies cry, I watch them grow

They will learn much more, than I will ever know,

And I think to myself,

What a wonderful world!

This was all I wanted to say tonight. And like it is done in all good old books, let me mention three morals of the story before I end.

1. You will never find Aladdin’s lamp in this life

2. Dream and Hard work can be your only true friends.

3. On cold dark nights, Fear will try to become a part your life but take help of Hard work to keep it out!

Thank you for listening to me patiently, wishing kids all the best in life!

Absolute Triumph of Idiocy!

Some things are beyond language!

You always felt it deep inside but couldn’t understand its full impact. In fact, great scientists failed to decipher it. Today we are talking about the absolute triumph of Idiocy, and that of dear idiots all around. This article is a humble ode although no words can do perfect justice to this amazing quality.

• 1.    Unpredictability: Men thought that all problems can be solved by supercomputers. It can make myriad calculations in Nano seconds and predict behaviour/outcome of any event. Only one quality defeated supercomputers and that was idiocy. Even the best supercomputers fail to predict an idiot and as their random behaviour has no pattern. Dealing with an intelligent person war far simpler and supercomputers were willing to be called an idiot rather than trying to understand idiocy.
• 2.     Omnipresence: It is the only quality on this earth that is truly omnipresent. It surpasses the artificial boundaries of nationality, religion, caste or creed and is spread evenly across rich/poor, young/old and beautiful/ugly. If there is any place where mankind exists, rest assured you will find idiots.   
• 3.     Numerical Superiority: The only thing that matters in this world is the numbers and idiots by far outnumber intelligent people. Idiots also never feel lonely as they always find company. They have unimaginable numerical superiority and in a democracy, they also choose the public representatives hence all elected representatives are especially sensitive to idiocy.   
• 4.     Social media compatibility: This is the digital age and all social media platforms are idiocy compatible. They have features especially suited to idiots and their entire architecture is based on it. People livestream idiocy and new people keep on learning from it. Different options are provided to spread it through pictures/status updates/tweets and no so social media platform can ignore this need to spread idiocy.
• 5.     Unimaginable Variety: The variety of idiots in this world exceeds the number of living species. There are idiots of zillion varieties and till today new idiots are beings located at astounding pace. Take an idiot of any field be it politics, religion or social butterflies and for every idiot on this earth, equal and opposite idiot exists.
• 6.     Tailor made for Lovers: Anyone who has ever fallen in love will vouch for this. When a person is in love, she/he happily does what is idiotic, love’s default mode is idiocy. For all intelligent snobs behaving haughtily, the probability of idiots finding love is disproportionately high. You now know the reason why you are or aren’t with the hottest person in town.   
• 7.     No Medicine Can Tame it: All artificial attempts to turn an idiot into intelligent have failed through the ages. You might swallow Almonds for all your life or drink ‘Shankh Pushpi’ but one can never get rid of idiocy. Even attempts to sharpen brain by playing Sudoku have failed miserable. For the idiots of this world only, Bollywood invented the saying ‘अब इन्हें दवा की नहीं, दुआ की ज़रुरत है’.
• 8.     Always on display: The favourite contest of this world is ‘See, I am an idiot’. The competition for deciding the winner is fiery.  Just look around and people find new ways to display it. The easiest example is English news channels in the guise of nation needing to know something. In reality, nation relishes watching idiocy; high TRP of such channels is a testimony to it. Entire market research of big companies is dedicated on making people more idiotic.
• 9.     None of us could escape is: Idiocy has proved to be more infectious that any bacteria or virus and spreads with ease. Entire societies get afflicted by different sorts of idiocy daily. No person on this earth could claim to have totally escaped it. It also has a hibernating quality and can appear after ages even in most intelligent people. In fact, it can co-exist and the sharpest person can be idiotic at the same time.   
• 10.  Happiness and Idiocy: Research has proved there is a deep correlation between being an idiot and being happy. An intelligent person worries about so many things and always finds a reason to be disappointed, an idiot is happy with a silver lining. In fact, an idiot is just happy. Now you know why ignorance is bliss.
• 11.   The Paradox of Idiocy: One can never understand all this and enjoy it at the same time. Once a person realises she/he has been an idiot, they further can’t be. This is the paradox of idiocy, you can only enjoy it only if you do not realise it. After that you can only envy!
• PS: In case you find this offensive, let the world know at your own risk :P

Dear Students...

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on, said Oscar Wilde. I will not disagree but when Rector of St Joseph's School popularly known as North Point asked me to address the school students on their graduation day, I could not say no.

Partially I agreed because I needed a reason to visit this beautiful school founded in 1888 in the backdrop of beautiful Kanchejungha range and partially because I feel young again when I am with schoolchildren.

Just in case you are interested in the address:

Father Shajumon, Rector St Joseph’s School, Faculty, Esteemed guests, Parents and Dear Students, A Very Good afternoon and Congratulations to the Graduating students. Life outside the school is a different world, and I am sure, all of you who graduate today look forward to it in anticipation.

I have this onerous responsibility, of addressing the school on this solemn occasion, and I would thank the School for believing that I am capable enough to do so.

Truth being told, I am really nervous standing here, my heart is pounding at a fast pace and I am trying all I can to hide the trepidation from my voice.

I did wish once or twice that some urgent work will come up and I will escape this but Father Shajumon was persuasive and vigilant at the same time to thwart my any such attempt.

When I give my address, I am expected to share the secrets of success, the panacea for all dilemmas, and pearls of wisdom that one could hold along while progressing in life.

As all of you look at me with hopeful eyes, I am feeling slightly burdened with expectations. It would have been easy, if there was some mathematical formula, that I could have explained, but thinking about what I should tell you on this day is way more difficult.

To engage you for next 5 minutes, I could think of five mantras that I would share. In case you want to doze off, trust me you are not going to lose much.

1. My first mantra is that there are no Secrets of Success: Yes, you heard me right. There are no secrets and all that you need to succeed has already been taught to you. The age old wisdoms that you would have been taught to you in school, which was painted on class walls and recited in morning assemblies will hold true for all your lives. There will be no substitute to hard work, honesty will always be the best policy and friends and family will be the only one on whom you could fall upon on tough times. Life is Boring, isn’t it? There is no magical wand in this world.

All of you would have heard the story of Aladdin and his magical lamp. When I was a child I was fascinated with that story and tried my best to find that lamp. I looked in remote corners, prayed fervently and through about going on jungle quests. I dreamt this lamp would make me fly continents, serve delicious dishes and who knows may bring a beautiful princess too. Trust my experience; the chances that you will find that lamp are really bleak!

2. My Second mantra is that you should Dream: I have been a dreamer all my life. When I was a kid one day I dreamt of being a pilot, a policeman and even the President of United States. Yes, that was weird but let there be no limits on what all you can dream. If you cannot dream it, you cannot do it. Imagine what possibilities lay ahead, what all you can be and how you are going to be the best. It always seems impossible until it is done and let there be no limits on your dreams.

3. Follow your dreams passionately: The bad news starts here, you must be worthy of your dreams. Nothing worth having comes easy hence you must follow your dreams passionately. I come from North India and the best career people believe in that area is becoming an IAS Officer. With so many people telling this to you, I started wanting it but was too scared to pursue it out. I got into IIT Kanpur, found a good job in a Paints factory but after working for four months, I realised this was not what I wanted to be.

I started getting nightmares that all my life I will end up selling paint. So one fine day, I left my job and decided to go for it. There is no escape from your dreams.

All of you must have heard about Michelangelo, the famous Italian artist. He has said ‘If people knew how hard I had to work to gain my mastery, it wouldn’t seem so wonderful at all’. Hard work is all that counts. All of you have immense potential, never let anyone belittle you or make you feel that you cannot do something. Just match it with required hard work. When you want something, the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it but you must want it from your heart.

4. Be Yourself and Be Happy: You would have heard the story of Donkey and the Dog. You have heard it right? A Donkey tried to act like the Dog and wake up the washerman by braying at night. What did he get, a beating instead. You can only be yourself, all others are taken. All your life, you will feel immense peer pressure, the pressure from social media and the pressure to conform to socially accepted norms. There are no perfect personalities, there are no perfect careers. Try to find out what you are passionate about. Your profession will fill the major part of your life and you cannot be trapped in something you do not enjoy.

With my limited experience, if you ask me what is the most important thing in this life, I would say being happy. Cultivate friendships, cultivate hobbies. Only a happy person can keep other happy. Life is the most beautiful gift that we have and you must enjoy it.

5. My final mantra is always be Hungry, always be Foolish: Let no day come when you get the feeling that you have arrived. Always remain hungry for more, believe that there are many things you still do not know. The saying goes ‘The more I know, the more I know that I do not know.’ Keep on asking questions, keep on learning new things, and let the student in you never die. The day you think you know all, your growth will also end. You may not always find answers but you must always be looking for them. Keep on pushing boundaries; let the fire for exploring new horizons always rage in you. Try new things, visit places, make new friends. Let the child in you always remain alive.

I am done with my five mantras but there is an important thing that I want you to take away from my address. Oscar Wilde has said that ‘The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.’ I would be happy even if you find it worth passing on.

Forget whatever I have said, the only thing that matters is not giving up in life. Remember: End is always fine, if it is not fine, it is not the end.

Best of Luck! World is yours, go ahead and conquer it! 
Thank You!